So late last night and the night before, I was - am - a Muslim.
I was expecting more heat. People calling me out to be a hypocrite or going on a moral high-horse. Though truth be told, I have no morals. Just a set of beliefs.
I even left myself wide open, with several ironies and deiscrepancies in the article. But apparently, a lot more people were relieved that I was on their side. Though I would not make the mistake of putting too much thought into what other people think. Lest I become one of them and start worrying about what goes on 9in their hypocritical heads.
Anyway, some people did mention their worry that I was becoming an Ultra-Malay. I do not know what this meant. I have no idea.
Is being a Malay - and a Muslim - albeit a bad one at that, something to be ashamed of?
I was simply worried about the rise of racism and religious fervor I am experiencing in this country.
I mean, what the fuck, man? We fuck each other. We should be able to love each other. Otherwise, it's a divorce.
Go back to your mama's house.
Anyway, yeah, rise of racism. Just ba few weeks ago, one woman told me, when I mentioned my wish to wear Baju Melayu to a function, "Baju Melayu is a thing of the past!"
It was said with such malice that it awoke the Malay in me. But I did not do anything, because I do not want to fuel all the racist bullshit that permeats Malaysia. Perhaps due to weak leadership. Perhaps due to other bullshit.
But anyway, I was labelled as a liberal turning into an ultra-Malay. Simply because I stopped bashing the Government and have turned my attentions to the opposition and NGOs, which I see are making stupid decisions.
SImply because I wrote about being Muslim, my way. I know it's not conventional. I know a lot of the motherfuckers who were affected by my sentiments would not get it.
But I am not here to explain myself. I will explain myself in the court of law, if it comes to that. And I have had enough of the court of public perception and public persecution that I do not give a shit anymore.
You can call me whatever. You can label me whatever. Only God can judge me. Properly.
Well, okay. If people are going to label me, which they always do, I might as well get into it. I'm a chronic approval-seeker, remember?
And like I said, I do not know what this 'ultra-Malay' meant. So I did what I always do - I turned to the Internet for information.
What I got was this:
I guess this is an example of an Ultra-Malay.
Man, I got to get me one of those shades. Then, I can turn to a superhero.
Gapo gegeh tuh?