Friday, April 17, 2009

Mindblock: How to Deal with Mingers

NOTE: MY MIND IS BLOCKED. SO FUCK YOU.

From Carl Jung to Neil Young (who the fuck is Neil Young?), humans have sought to explain the differences between the sexes.

I find this thing by Video Jug to be an apt collection of fast tips on what a man wants in a relationship:

How to be the Perfect Girlfriend

An excerpt from the video:

"A man needs space to be with his friends, with whom he will do manly things like grunting, fighting and measuring things."

But how does one deal with women?

Especially if your girlfriend, is a minger (n. ugly bitch).

Firstly, there is the most underrated beauty aid in the modern world - the cattle prod.

If your woman is ugly, a simple direct application of the cattle prod - from hereon referred to as the 'beauty stick' - will alleaviate her symptoms.



Ugly Woman

+


'Beauty Stick'

=


Thai University Student

Secondly, always use a safe word. Mine's the sixth sick Sheik's sixth sheep's sick.

Enjoy yourself.