Wednesday, July 16, 2008


I am torn between the path of righteousness and the path of non-reaction.

I know that if I go down the way of the ego, I can prove everything I have said. EVERYTHING. I got proof in the form of documents. I got witnesses. I have photographs.

I can and will win in any court - public or legal.

I would have to concede some ground, lose some battles, but ultimately I will win the war.

I can prove that I am right. That I am not some crazy delusional maniac who have also lost his crazy, delusional mind.

There are some people who are trying very hard to convince me that I am crazy. That I'll turn into what they've always said I will turn into - a maniac, a psycho-killer.

It's blood for blood by the gallon. This is the old days. The bad days. The all-or-nothing days. They're BACK.

I can make sure that instead the hand of God, I will use the Hand of Nod.


I can just go into zen. And just let it be. I can let the natural order of things to reveal the truth and the true face of idiots.

And when they crumble, I will not even be there to clap my hands or anything. Because their stupid lives and their stupid considerations are NONE OF MY FUCKING BUSINESS.

It's all beneath me.

I won't have to stand up to anyone because it is THEY who have to stand up to me. The bigger me. The ultimate me. The ultimate ego.

I can just not react and not let any of the stupidity get to me. And I can concentrate on my work. On myself. Instead of on other people.

I can just coast. Chill-lax. Be one with the Omniverse and shit like that.

In other words, I can be a reality demon or I can be Buddha.

As always, it is a choice.