Monday, August 31, 2009

Messiah Complex

Hi, my name is Amir, and I will be your messiah for today.

Uncle Najib said we should break the walls down.

Well, there are two ways to do this. One is to actually break down walls. Another way is to disregard the existence of walls.

The walls that Uncle Najib talks about are psychological barriers.

Some asshole poet once said, "If you prick us, do we not bleed?"

Malaysians have more in common than we think. For one, we're mammals. Which means that our females have tits. We grab them and massage them and suck on them - all of us. We all suck.

Malaysians breathe air. Some of us, smoke, but that's just air with thousands of chemicals and monocarbons and dust.

Most Malaysians walk on two legs, while some, like Karpal Singh, sometimes has wheels.

Karpal: Come to me, my X-Men!

Malaysians eat through their mouths and shit through our ass. Some, eat ass. Some put strange things in their asses. However, generally, the ass is used for one vital function - to shit and be shat on in return for a night of scatology.

Malaysians are vertebrates. All Malaysians masturbate. All Malaysians have seen porn in one way or another.

See? We have more in common than we do differences.

As your messiah, I command you to fuck each other now! It is our only hope - by having sex, we won't have time to search for a cow's head or build anything people don't want.

Fill your time-table with sex, and you will feel better. I have been sent by God to teach you that sex is the way. Sex will save us all!

Ahhh! Messiah! AHHHHHH!!!