Saturday, June 14, 2008

national Pornographic Sexplorer: LIVE from Bangkok

I am now in Bangkok and as usual, the trip has been a blast.

In the past few days, I have talked to two girls (one go go and one massage) on how to improve the circumstances of farmers and the general agricultural industry of Thailand.

I almost got thrown into Thai prison. I rediscovered the Seven Positions of Buddha. I was also warned by massage girls to stay away from certain places in Bangkok because there might or will be demonstrations soon.

There's also the new discoveries: Go Go Marketplace and the BEST A GO GO IN ALL OF THAILAND. As well as a new catchphrase Cheepork and I have been using - Kaze no Yoooooooooooooooooooo ni Hayaku!

These are possible titles of the Bangkok-Pattaya Trip in the upcoming weeks:

National Pornographic Sexplorer: Kaze no Yo ni Hayaku

National Pornographic Sexplorer: The Future of Thai Agriculture

National Pornographic Sexplorer: The Green Chocobo

National Pornographic Sexplorer: The Seven Positions of Buddha

National Pornographic Sexplorer: Cheepork the Fucking Tourist

National Pornographic Sexplorer: Secrets of Pattaya Revealed

National Pornographic Sexplorer: To Bang Sue and Back - the Search for the Ultimate Massage Parlour Within Walking Distance to the LRT

National Pornographic Sexplorer: CAUGHT! I am a Criminal

National Pornographic Sexplorer: The Marketplace of the Gods

National Pornographic Sexplorer: Picking Up Japanese Men

National Pornographic Sexplorer: Those Things They Sell in Thai 7-Elevens

For now, I am going back to my room to watch somebody who looks and sounds like Sir Ian McKellen play Heidi's grandfather. My room has 56 channels. Free.

I will have a communications blackout for a few days. If anything big goes down in Bangkok, I might just stay here and submit reports to whatever news agency/newspaper that wants it.

For now, I am safe.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to listen to Ian McKellen.

Cheers.

Kaze no yoooooooooooooooo ni HAYAKU!

(and tonight, Soi Cowboy)