Saturday, November 28, 2009

Pimpin' Cheepork

Okay, I'll level with you. One of my best friends, Cheepork, is lonely.

Since I get pussy thrown at me every day, and Cheepork is my main supplier of TV series, I think I'll do him a favour.

Anyone wants to hook up with Cheepork can do so by going to his website.

CAPTION: CHEEPORK giving 'em the finger

Here are Cheepork's vital statistics:

Name: Cheepork

Age: 29

Build: Short, but with knowledge of Silat Cekak Hanafi.

Skin Colour: What's race got to do with it?

Education: SDAR (1993-1997), MMU (1998-2003)

Preferences: Short, skinny, cute girls. Or something that looks like short, skinny, cute girls. Communication skills a must. Bust size not important. Shaved, shaken and stirred.

Staying Power: one hour foreplay, up to four hours pure fucking.

Dick: Girthy, long and black, according to 'paid consultants' (hos).

Language Proficiency(out of 10): Malay: 8, English: 7, Thai: 3

Computer Skills: Microsoft Office: Proficient, File Transfer Protocol and Peer-to-peer: Expert, Lightwave 3D: Beginner, Adobe Photoshop, InDesign, etc.

Positions: Doggy, missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, 69, Yoga Fire, Yoga Teleport, Seven Positions of Buddha

Current Position: Managerial.

Likes: Intellectual discussions, interfaith discussions, movies, being cool. Thailand.

Dislikes: Politics, idiots, breeders, broken promises.

Potential Advantages: Cheepork has a job, and has lots of porn. Meaning if you are with him, you'll never go hungry. He'll whip up something for you. Loyal. Reliable. Martial arts skills. Long black.

Potential Disadvantages: Tendency to mope around for whatever. Needy. Lots of porn. Martial arts skills. A dick in a glass case(in case of emergency, break open glass).

Has own transport and owns an apartment unit.

Any takers?