Friday, November 6, 2009

The Final Frontier

Religion. The final frontier. These are the voyages the Pimp Master G. Its continuing mission: to destroy new worlds and new civilisations. To boldly 'boh' where no one has 'bohed' before.

The above video is that of Ustaz Asri, a former mufti who was arrested by Jabatan Agama Islam Selangor (JAIS) for not being qualified to talk about religion in the state of Selangor.

Not qualified. To talk about religion.

Shit, man. Asri was a mufti - an official cleric, like an Islamic consultant or something.

If a fucking mufti can't talk about Islam in Selangor, then who can? Ronnie Liu?

Judging by the initial response and feedback, a lot of murmurs on the ground points to political fighting and jealousy amongst the clerics and high-ranking Islamic officials in Malaysia, which resulted in a civil war claiming Ustaz Asri as first blood.

I am not a pious Muslim, and some people have even called me a non-Muslim. I don't give a shit. God only knows, and only God knows.

So I haven't been keeping track of the 'Islamic politics' plaguing the land, but this sounds like the Highlander movie to me.

Nadim Islamic Dude: There can be only one!

Asri Islamic Dude: I have prepared them for you! The quickening is before us!

Never in my life did I ever think they would make such a cartoon of this religion. Well, actually that's a lie. They have been making a cartoon of it from Anwar's ABIM days.

Think about it. The first word ever spoken by God in the Koran, in chronological order is READ. Read, in the name of thy God.

And yet, when people nowadays want to read up on their religion, the fucking fun-the-mentalists say, "Oh, you can't read. You can't read, bitches! You need to be QUALIFIED to read and understand the Koran. The Koran is not for YOU. It's for the clerics. QUALIFIED clerics."

And when a QUALIFIED cleric reads it, and reads it aloud, they bust his ass.

Now, I'm not for the reading of the Koran. I believe that reading the Koran will only get us into bloodshed, because of these idiots.

They don't want me to read the Koran, then fine, motherfucker. I'll fucking read comic books. I gotta read something, right? Can't read the Koran cause I'm not qualified. But I'm qualified to read comic books.

First comic book I'm reading tonight? Buddha by Osamu Tezuka.

I understand comic books. SO fuck all this shit. Fuck JAIS. Fuck Asri. Fuck the Wahabis, the Nik Azizis, the Hadi Awangis, the PISis the Hassan Aliiis fuck all of them.

I'm reading comic books. And you can take your qualifications, roll it up real tight, shine it up real nice, turn that sumbitch sideways and stick it up your ass.