Friday, October 30, 2009

Tales from the Drunk Side: Loines and Curves

I went to work, and my fucking Blackberry, my love, my precious, died on me.

Oh, woe is me! I'm in paiiinnn! Muahahaha! At least I'm crying over a phone. Some people cry over even lesser shit. Like being alive. And being around other people.

Fuck that shit. It's all about my phone now.

Every time it tries to get a signal, it turns itself off. I'm buying a new one tomorrow. Perhaps a Blackberry Curve. From The Curve? We shall see. Or perhaps Midvalley Megamall.

To top it off, somebody took my keyboard from my desk, perhaps mistaking it for company property. It's not. I bought it. I use the keyboard to type as I go through one keyboard every two months (I learned to type on a classic typewriter) and didn't want my laptop to suffer the same fate.

Keyboard = RM10-RM35

Laptop = RM1700

I'll sacrifice a keyboard on the altar of techno-destruction any day, if I can save my laptop.

Small matter. I now have a Mac keyboard - now that's company property - and it is more interesting to use than my old one. I mean, it has two USB hubs, which makes transfer of pictures from a borrowed camera that much easier.

Furthermore, that keyboard which they took was set to die at any time anyway. The buttons E, I, L, N and O are losing their white paint, because 'LOINE' is my favourite word, and I can sense some of the keys getting loose already.

All in all, it was a good day. Despite feeling naked and incapacitated without my Blackberry, and having to learn to type using a new keyboard.

This also spurs me to change to Celcom. Been a Maxis customer for six years now, and they still charge me higher than Celcom. Am perhaps taking the Exec 250 package, which comes with free Celcom Broadband and the Blackberry Curve for less than RM600.

I shall report whether these deals are true or just some stupid gimmick soon.

If it's legit, and if I can use the Celcom Broadband as well in my house, I'm ditching the Maxis Broadband thingy too.

So, yeah, it has been a good day. I can't wait till tomorrow. I am getting a new phone, and there are some tasks which I need to complete, but couldn't today (due to my Blackberry 8700G dying a premature death).

I really hope the Celcom customer service people are nice and friendly. In fact, fuck nice and friendly, I hope they're human.

With Maxis, the best customer service is at KLCC. The rest of the outlets suck ass, most of them. So fuck that shit, man.

Usually, if the service is almost the same, I go for people who are nice and professional, and have good communication skills.

It is hard enough to order at a mamak stall without using sign language these days, I am not taking any shit at places where they have enough resources to train their employees better.

It doesn't take much to smile and not be condescending, or to NOT treat everyone as an enemy, but as possible accomplices and/or customers.

Anyway, expect to get a lot of postings from the new Blackberry tomorrow.

Furthermore, somebody tried to use some Feng Shui face-reading technique on me today.

Too late.

One, I already had mine read using Flying Star Feng Shui. I have a mole on my left eyebrow, which in Feng Shui translates to 'hidden treasure'. My Buddha ears and earlobe depict prosperity and long life, while my crooked nose tells me that I am evil...or got punched in the face when I was 12 and never got it fixed.

Two, I don't believe in any of that shit.

To rely on magic is to grasp at straws.

Magic may have happened centuries ago (actually, I don't think so, but am avoiding offending any sensitive religious fuckers who are insecure about their own faiths and belief systems) but no one walks on water anymore. No one can part the Red Sea nowadays without a very, very big helicopter the size of the moon. Staffs don't turn to snakes anymore, and camels don't spring forth from stone and start talking in this day and age.

I do not believe mankind will ever discover teleportation. We would kill ourselves for our egos wayyy before that happens.

So, no. Not me. I am the alpha and the omega of my shit. Not Your Anus or Neptune or Jupiter.

Pluto's not even a planet. So fuck that shit.

Am going into the bedroom now. Have to catch up on my sleep debt.

Cheers, brosephs!