Monday, June 8, 2009

Tales from the Drunk Side: The Bat Signal

Remember that charity project I was talking about months ago?

Well, in a few weeks' time, I think I can spare some time to make it happen.

First phase is simple - food, clothing, shelter.

Using my uncharted psionic powers, I will set-up a thing, see? And this thing, you're gonna come running and buy food for the hungry. Clothe the semi-nude. Believe me, you don't want to see them semi-nude, much less in the nude.

And then, I found out that in order to construct homes on the East Coast, you only need RM15,000.

RM5,000 for the workers, and RM10,000 for the material. For an almost 500 square feet house. Which can be the new home for 8 people.

So save up, people.

I know some of you do this already with your church thing and whatever, but it's time to get organised. I am not the most organised person around. Currently, my table has two bottles, one can, a few CDs, spome empty cigarette boxes, cotton buds, an ashtray in the shape of a man fucking a woman, a receipt from Pantai Medical center, Actal anti-acid box and tablets, a spoon, a syringe, a paper weight and lots of business cards.

So, I will get help from a few foundations and organisations. ALL monetary donations will go through the foundations. You can even get tax-deductible shit.

I might have access to some manpower, from my cult. Harnessing the power of my cult, I believe I can get enough people to do stuff.

Your role - the public's role - will be at the center of this plan. You will be providing the funds and material necessary for it to happen. I would also need volunteers.

And the time is close, but not yet. Don't send me emails to join the thing. Not yet.

However, I have started writing letters to get these other components firmly on board.

I will make a proper proposal once I have all the formal details about the people we are helping.

I'll take some pictures and lay down some stats. When I get the information.

This will not be a Power Rangers Lightspeed Rescue. I am targeting August or September. Or it could be faster. I dunno. A lot of moving components I have to look at, and chances of failure are huge.

But who gives a shit?

My ego is righteous enough to at least pull off one charity project for 2009.

After that, flood victims.

And then, defribillators for ambulances.

And then, AIDS sufferers.

And after that, The Book Project.

I am so fucking cool.