Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow?

This was done more than three years ago.

In my travels, I have seen the future. And what a strange future it is.

Let me tell you how the world will work.

The best and most popular website will one day be scripted and designed by a 14-year-old kid in Amsterdam, on Dec 22, 2012, using only open source.

It will be a website that connects vibrating vaginas and dildos across the world. When the geek does an app for Facebook and blogs and Twitter and Youtube and Google Wave, it will revolutionise the Internet.

It will redefine the term 'poke' in a Facebook context. Twitter will come up with something called Clitter.

Everyone's dicks and vaginas and clitorises will be linked together. Smartphones, when ringing, will vibrate battery-operated vaginas and dildos, causing arousals and orgasms all over the world.

This vibration by the world's dominant species will shift tectonic plates and destroy Japan several times over.

And this is how the world will end.

And then the bubble will burst yet again. And Kevin Costner's dystopian future world of The Postman will come to pass.