And so Death said to me, tonight, "I hate it when there's all this bullshit with you."
"Wha?"
"I feel that whenever we talk, there's always a wall. That you've erected defenses. The bullshit."
"Ah, you mean, the image."
So I told her.
"I am the most arrogant motherfucker ever. I look down on everyone. I believe that human minds are not strong enough to experience me. Therefore, as a favour to mankind, I process myself and present to them, a face, a side which they can understand.
Because humans only think of themselves. They can only understand one facet of humanity at a time. They can only think in boxes.
So I get into a box, labelled properly, and I give myself to them. For them to suck my dick.
For if people knew what and who I am, they will kill me. Some, after knowing me, went mad."
Neil Gaiman once wrote, in the book Faces of Fantasy, "These are not our faces. Blahblahblah."
He was writing about how when people meet writers, they always say, "I thought you'd be taller" or older, or wiser.
Neil Gaiman also said, through his characterisation of Erasmus Fry in the Great Work Sandman's Calliope, that "Writers are liars, my dear."
It is the ego of the writer. The righteousness.
We are always bigger from inside our heads. Gaiman again. Delirium. In The Kindly Ones. I think.
Writers understand the nature of truth. That truth is malleable, that it depends primarily on perception. Quantum physics, yadda yadda yadda.
It is not because I think I'm special. Everyone are just that - facets. Not faces. Facets. And no one, not a single person, has enough time on earth to understand each and every side, each and every angle.
I do not believe in good or evil people. Just people. Being stupid. Playing games.
I used to pity them. I don't anymore. Because it is a waste of my time. Time I should be spending thinking about myself.
So I did the most economical thing. I take everyone, put them in a large box and label them all as IDIOTS IN DENIAL. Who deserve a nuclear holocaust.
And shelve them somewhere. And went merrily on my way.
