Monday, December 31, 2012

2012 Part I

This year has been about escalating violence and stupidity. The world didn't end on Dec 21, but seeing what has happened in the world these past few months, I wonder whether it should have.

A young man took weapons to a school, shot and killed 26 people, 20 of them kids between 6-7 years old.

Meanwhile, a 23-year-old Indian woman was kidnapped, raped and beaten, then thrown off a bus.

Her 6 rapists inserted a metal rod into her, either through her vagina or anus, far enough to cause abdominal infection.

And yet she was lucid enough to give a testimony to the authorities that many believe don't really care about upholding the law and protecting the innocent. She died due to her severe injuries.

I read that her ordeal - the rape and the beating - lasted over an hour. And she was just coming out of a cinema. She just wanted to see a movie, as those kids in Sandy Brooks probably were just looking forward to recess.

All this, framed by the war in Gaza.

I see echos here in Malaysia. I'm not the cleanest guy around. In fact, I once grabbed a girl's ass in a pub, intoxicated I was with youth, stupidity and other things. But I do worry for a society - our society - that would say all a woman needs is a dick in her vagina, or that women who dress sexy are just asking for a metal rod shoved up her butt and into her intestines.

It saddens me that religion has been abused to commit these crimes. Gaza, India, the US, even here. Religion has been abused and misinterpreted so that people focus on things like dress codes and periods and semi-magic rituals and spell-casting rather than peace, tolerance, and all the other gay crap.

I mean, in Malaysia, a lot of Muslims are spending most of their 'religion time' to tell other people that they're doing religion the wrong way, like what I'm doing right now. They tell others how they pray, and how some inflections are correct, or they fight over the name of God. For what? Do you really believe God gives a flying fuck?

As a Malay man, I know I can get away with a lot of stuff. A LOT of stuff. I take my business elsewhere, though, in order to ensure I do not descend into becoming those six monkeys in that bus. Does that make me better than you, you might be wondering? I dunno. I never shoved a metal rod up people's asses. Not literally.

It's not about whether I am better or whether you are better. That's purely egotistical. I just wish that we, as a species, have had enough.

On a more personal front, my father's condition has deteriorated. I once witnessed how my grandparents got old and now I am seeing the same thing with my father.

We get old, we get ugly, we lose those things that we think make us who we are, and then we die. Nothing lasts forever.

Even more personal, I was going through perhaps the worst period of the year in the past few months. I felt the dark vibes and there was really nothing more I could do about it other than stand my ground and take care of what I can.

I'm glad 2012 is ending. I got plans for next year, for 2013. I know the what, but have yet to firm up the how and the who.