Part of growing up, I guess, is making decisions.
I am a machine. I work like one. So any emotional aspect of anything is delayed.
I was caught up in the execution of things that I didn't even notice the emotional ramifications until I made some headway into things.
Suddenly, it hit me like a sledgehammer. Right in the chest. Bam!
I was floored.
I thought it would be easier, since I am older.
But I'm taking a dump now, so everything's better.
Everything changes, nothing is truly lost.