Saturday, December 27, 2008

Delirium

Second day of the flu. And bronchitis.

In the morning, after almost 20 hours of sleep, I coughed up brown phlegm. That's red blood cells, pus and accumulated mucus. My throat or my lungs must be inflamed.

Hopefully, the fever will break. Soon. But, going through this highlights the reality of things. When things are going down, there's only one person you can count on - yourself.

Fuck everyone else. They always want something from you. Use you or manipulate you. Fuck all of them.

They're stupid. And there's nothing I can do for them. They won't listen to me, fucking assholes. So they will die in their stupidity.

As for me, I just need to let go. I got my own life, and my own sickness to tend to.

I need to boost up my immune system. First, food. Then, medication. And sunlight. The skin produces natural vitamins when exposed to sunlight.

Rhinoviruses gets washed down with more water I drink, and dies in ultra-violet light.

Vitamin C gets rid of 60% of flu symptoms. Zinc helps in the absorption of Vitamin C. And I would need lots and lots of warm water. And painkillers. Medication that knocks me out prevents me from smoking. Gives a chance to the lungs to repair itself.

I would need three boxes of tissues. Need to get as much mucus out as I can.

And for now, sleep.