Who's more racist - men or women?
Women. And because of them, I stopped peeing in urinals.
I was walking around, minding my own business the other day, when women started talking about dicks.
"Indians men have big dicks."
"Chinese men have small dicks"
"Malay men have multiple dicks."
I was like, what kind of racist shit is this?
I'm not gay, but I have seen my fair share of dicks. All that urban legend about dicks may work in a general manner, but it doesn't mean it's true for everyone.
I've seen Indian men with small dicks and Chinese men with big dicks.
This racist-dickist perspective creates insecurities amongst men.
Every Indian men now HAVE to have a big dick, otherwise he is a failure in life.
Every Chinese dude is worried that people are going to start laughing at the size of his dick, even though it might just be normal, average-sized.
Forevermore paranoid about the size of their dicks, men start doing crazy shit. Some actions are meant to overcompensate, others to hide or distract.
Men who show racist tendencies or say bigoted things are not really racist or believe in the hype. They're just worried about their dicks.
Look at the cow's head protesters in Shah Alam - a clear demonstration of men who are worried about their dicks. They're worried that women think their dicks are small, so they strut and shout and decapitate a cow and shit.
Hindraf gathering? Same shit. A bunch of worried ass men. Also, curious as to how the size of their dicks did not translate to trillions.
What was the name of the last group to protest the assimilation of Chinese schools? Dong something-something, right? I mean...Dong? I rest my case on that.
Worrying about our dicks caused us to wave kerises over our heads. Being worried about our dicks compelled some of us to shout "racism!" at every juncture, so as to pull attention away from their dicks.
Most of us are afraid to see each other as brothers, for fear that the size of our dicks would come into question.
The dick issue has also compelled me to pee only in the toilet. Why?
1. My dick is average-sized. I don't like to compare.
2. I don't want to be part of the statistic.
3. Some freaks grabbed my dick - while I was peeing - twice in my life. I'm traumatised and shit. I'm a victim! Boo hoo hoo.
Solving the riddle of the dick will result in world peace and the end of global warming. WIth no more hot air coming forth from the asses of assholes, we shall have a cooler planet.
Let us put our dick issues aside and move on with our lives. There's more to it than dick.