Thursday, December 18, 2014

Intermission

Today was my last Stage 2 physiotherapy session but the process continues and will not end until I die. Had the session in the morning. I passed all tests and performed better than everyone else, but then again, I'm quite a fit 34-year old among mostly 50-60-year-olds.

Since the heart attack almost four months ago, I have lost 18kg and now look extremely dashing and handsome and sexy. Especially when I wear my suits, all of which had to be altered to accomodate my smaller body.

I started work on Dec 1 at The Malaysian Reserve. The day before, I made a day-trip to Kuantan to see my family. My father was not really present when I told him my prognosis, which is bad. According to statistics, people with my condition usually die within six months to six years, on average.

My time is limited. I don't know how long I have but I firmly believe it is shorter than anyone else's and I would die sooner than I thought.

I can feel it encroaching. I fall asleep, sometimes, when previously I would be roaring with energy. Especially at night. I run out of energy quickly nowadays and I can't power through things by working all night. I totally shut down by 11pm or so and fall asleep at 12 midnight.

The good thing that has come out of this, aside from my weight loss and wholesome good looks, is that I focus on things and people that matter. I love comic books and writing, so I'm doing exactly that. I don't like many people, so I don't associate myself with them, or even talk to the fuckers.

My life is simple and I constantly try to better my odds and reduce my risk by exercising regularly and strictly controlling what I eat. Maybe I can live another 10 or 12 years, or 200, I dunno.

I know that whatever time I have left, I don't want to waste it.