Wednesday, September 9, 2009

The Heavy-Handed Immoral Teachings of Amir Hafizi of Bukit Kuin

What the fuck is happening to our country, man? We are drowning in religious fervour. Racism. A few more powder keps and a few more idiots, we will have May 13 all over again.

Ask Anwar. He might have a date set-up.

I want Anwar on the case, man. Anwar is our best hope.

I want Anwar to say when we are going to have a race riot. Cause you know why? Cause if he said it, it ain't never gonna happen.

Anwar: There will be a race riot in Shah Alam with 50 dead on Sept 16, 2009.


Come Sept 16, I'll be in Shah Alam, visiting relatives and co-workers. Not a machete on me.

Anwar had a hand in this arabica coffee bean-nisation of our country. That's how I see it. I could be wrong. If I'm wrong, well, fuck you. This is an opinion, and everyone's got one like they do assholes, right? Well, here's my asshole.

Before the 70s, Malaysians were fucking each other on the fields. Everyone looked like everyone else. SHit, I looked at my parents' old photos and I had trouble distinguishing the Ooi Eow Jins from the Michael Veerapens to the M Shariff and the Zuhrah IIs.

My father told me that in the past, Malays celebrated Hari raya by going to mosque in the morning, buying a bottle of whisky, putting it in their baju melayu pockets, taking a bus to town, and drink while watching the matinee. Usually a Tarzan movie.

"Steady Tarzan! Steady Tarzan!"

What the fuck happened, man?

My relatives, the old ones, they were wearing tight baju kebayas with corsets - fucking corsets, okay - permed hair and oversized aviator sunglasses.

Nowadays, they all dress up like pyramids.

What the fuck happened?

Shah of Iran happened. The Islamic revolution. On a global scale.

Now, I'm not gonna condemn any religion - especially Islam - cause I think that's not the real issue here. All religions, teach good things. Even Scientology.

At the philosophical level, all religions teach you how to be good. Nothing wrong with religion.


Now, the social aspect of it is fucked up.

Humans like to compete. All humans are like stuck in a perpetual Olympics. They compete over everything.

"My father got heart disease, diabetes and stroke."

"Oh yeah? My father got heart disease, diabetes, stroke, high blood pressure and a bad leg. I winnn! I winnn! I winnn!"

What the fuck did you win?

Now, religion was, and is okay. And then, the spirit of human competition, the need for the ego to be better than everyone else - or at least be at a passing mark - comes in and ruins everything.

People started competing on how pious they were.

"I fast a full month in Ramadan."

"I fast for a full month in Ramadan AND six days in Syawal."

At first, this was still okay. I mean, it was harmless.

And then, when they start running out of shit to compete, in the category of self-improvement and rituals, they start comparing other things.

One of them - just one - is how better they were at keeping people in line. When the spirit of competition amongst humans enters religion, and pushes it to this stage, that's when the shit hits the fan.

And for their role models? Politicians.



Politicians? Politicians need to be popular. Nothing wrong with that. But if you base your life on politicians all you'd ever think about is being popular. Botox injections, wives with big hair, mansions, palaces, Nokia N-series, Toyota Harriers. Popularity and religion is a dangerous combination, if it is focused on certain paths.

And guess what? We are on one of those paths right now.

I recall the original teachings of the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him. He was preaching about how people are similar, despite the obvious differences in class and race, amongst other things.

In fact, some scholars have him being called derisively by the Quraisy as "that man who tells us to eat with slaves."

"I ain't eating with slaves, motherfucker! They be black!"

Muhammad's original revolutions, according to some sources, from the social viewpoint, was about breaking down social barriers.

Now, around a millenium and a half later, people who claim to be following the religion are putting those barriers back up.

Think about it. Muhammad would not have had much success with Islam if it was only intended for one race. He showed tolerance, compassion and mercy. That's why a lot of enemies joined Muhammad. That's why a small religion became the global power we see today. An all-inclusive, all-embracing philosophy. Uniting, not dividing.

Way I see it, if any preacher starts preaching hate, fuck 'em. I don't care if it's hatred towards people of other religion, hatred towards UMNO, Dr M, PIS, PR - that's not religion, that's politics!

If Muhammad is alive today, would he condone those acts?

There was a story that on his death bed, Muhammad was shown the future by God. And Muhammad said this, with sadness in his voice, as his last words, "My people, my people..."

Same thing with Jesus, Buddha, I-Ching, Joseph Smith, Moses, Krishna and Sea-Man.

If they had a time machine TV, and saw the future, they would go nuts!

Joseph Smith: Not in my name, you cracker-ass cracker! Not in my motherfucking name!

I Ching: Tiu nia maaahhh!!! Tien aaah!!! Tim kai ahhhh!!!

Buddha: Dude...chill...I said all this shit at the deer park, man. What's wrong with you? Mellow out. Karma, man. Karrrrmaaaaa...

Moses: I parted the Red Sea for this shit? And where's my Ten Commandments? What the fuck is this Terms and Conditions that have replaced my easy to read guideline?

Good God, man. Please, please, stop abusing religion and using it as a front for hate and racism.

We got here, where we are today, in this kind of religious intensity, cause of Anwar's generation. I wonder how religion and race-relations would be like, when my generation, Gen-X, start turning 50.

One can always dream.